It's funny when I put the world on mute. Except I never laugh, and they'd ask me what's wrong. And in my head I always respond, There's nothing wrong with being a wallflower.
It's always a different song, but it always blends in warmly. Any song, any scene, any face, any expression.
Today, as I nestled in the quiet of sitting on the teacher's cushioned seat, I observed. I learned more about the people around me as I watched them than when we'd exchanged some words. I found who liked the attention a little more than the norm, and who wanted to be left alone, and who was too preoccupied to even keep their head in the classroom. I saw who meant to play nice and who wanted to fit in. These people, they're ridiculous. And the majority of them had the objective of making the class laugh. It was funny to see the subtle disappointed expression on someone's face when they didn't receive as much laughs as expected.
Drowned by the humorous objectives, there are those that watch like I do. And it was nice watching them too. It's like they could have the same thought patterns running through their brains, though I always doubt it because I find mine more strange and obscure. And I always wonder if they see me too. And then I chew on that and feel a little alone all of a sudden. Because I convince myself that no one is watching me, and no one sees me, and no one shares the same. But as alone as that feels, I still like the pleasantries of my quiet, and their quiet, and the others' murmurs because we're all in the same room after all, and I couldn't keep that alone as long as I watched and remembered that these quiets and these noises are what brings me home to the peace I have with myself.
Some days it's nice to find myself some silence in a place scattered with sounds. Because most days, I'm one of the loudest sounds in the places scattered with sounds.
It's always a different song, but it always blends in warmly. Any song, any scene, any face, any expression.
Today, as I nestled in the quiet of sitting on the teacher's cushioned seat, I observed. I learned more about the people around me as I watched them than when we'd exchanged some words. I found who liked the attention a little more than the norm, and who wanted to be left alone, and who was too preoccupied to even keep their head in the classroom. I saw who meant to play nice and who wanted to fit in. These people, they're ridiculous. And the majority of them had the objective of making the class laugh. It was funny to see the subtle disappointed expression on someone's face when they didn't receive as much laughs as expected.
Drowned by the humorous objectives, there are those that watch like I do. And it was nice watching them too. It's like they could have the same thought patterns running through their brains, though I always doubt it because I find mine more strange and obscure. And I always wonder if they see me too. And then I chew on that and feel a little alone all of a sudden. Because I convince myself that no one is watching me, and no one sees me, and no one shares the same. But as alone as that feels, I still like the pleasantries of my quiet, and their quiet, and the others' murmurs because we're all in the same room after all, and I couldn't keep that alone as long as I watched and remembered that these quiets and these noises are what brings me home to the peace I have with myself.
Some days it's nice to find myself some silence in a place scattered with sounds. Because most days, I'm one of the loudest sounds in the places scattered with sounds.
