Stolen
Dear --,
I decided to make this direct to you because you are my right-hand man, my wing man [er, woman?] And when I get like this, I can only imagine venting to you because you know me when I get like this.
Yesterday, the very words were threatening to burst out of my very lips. And mind you, it frightened my very core that I wanted it very much. Astonished, I pressed myself to him to close up what ever infinitesimal space we had there, and hoped that he'd somehow know. And he did it. He always does that. He looked at me with his squinting, caramelized eyes that relentlessly know to soften my knees and tighten my hold on him, and I lose it. I forget why I'd been so apprehensive and why I'm waiting for time to stop so that we were all that mattered.
Do I even deserve this? I want to be better. I have to be better. And now that I realize it is possible for me to...love him.. I question myself. And I beat myself up that I'm being more selfish, more wrong than I've ever been.
It always feels right to do wrong, and wrong to do right. "We all look like we feel..."
I can't go back now. I shouldn't turn around anymore. Because this song is playing now. Playing over the song before. I'm sorry...
"Tell me you're happy, one more time," he said. And that's enough to him. Because I'm enough to him.
I decided to make this direct to you because you are my right-hand man, my wing man [er, woman?] And when I get like this, I can only imagine venting to you because you know me when I get like this.
Yesterday, the very words were threatening to burst out of my very lips. And mind you, it frightened my very core that I wanted it very much. Astonished, I pressed myself to him to close up what ever infinitesimal space we had there, and hoped that he'd somehow know. And he did it. He always does that. He looked at me with his squinting, caramelized eyes that relentlessly know to soften my knees and tighten my hold on him, and I lose it. I forget why I'd been so apprehensive and why I'm waiting for time to stop so that we were all that mattered.
Do I even deserve this? I want to be better. I have to be better. And now that I realize it is possible for me to...love him.. I question myself. And I beat myself up that I'm being more selfish, more wrong than I've ever been.
It always feels right to do wrong, and wrong to do right. "We all look like we feel..."
I can't go back now. I shouldn't turn around anymore. Because this song is playing now. Playing over the song before. I'm sorry...
"Tell me you're happy, one more time," he said. And that's enough to him. Because I'm enough to him.
WhoElse.
PS, Thank you for listening, --. I knew you'd understand.
