I just keep sleeping so much. When I'm home, I sleep, or eat. Or just lay there and fill myself with empty thoughts. I consume myself. I attack my thoughts, the very core that is me. I question everything around me, everything of me, everything about me.
You know that happy place that we're suppose to put ourselves in when we feel low? Our happy place, you know. Yeah, my happy place is such a stupid place. It's this euphoria of twists and sins. It's not euphoric at all. It's more like.. convenience for me. It's this place of things that could potentially make me happy but not really. Reality breaks me down so well in my head that even my thoughts run bleak.
Sometimes in my head, nothing is allowed to exist or have existed. There is no black and white. There's only gray. There are no rights, there are no wrongs. Rules aren't rules. They're just contradictions of what ever you want them to be. Rule is you have to think outside of the box. You have to think about you. It's selfish. In my head, it's selfish.
It's 2:50am and I swear to anything holy, I have no idea what I just wrote about. Today was an off day.
I should be asleep.
You know that happy place that we're suppose to put ourselves in when we feel low? Our happy place, you know. Yeah, my happy place is such a stupid place. It's this euphoria of twists and sins. It's not euphoric at all. It's more like.. convenience for me. It's this place of things that could potentially make me happy but not really. Reality breaks me down so well in my head that even my thoughts run bleak.
Sometimes in my head, nothing is allowed to exist or have existed. There is no black and white. There's only gray. There are no rights, there are no wrongs. Rules aren't rules. They're just contradictions of what ever you want them to be. Rule is you have to think outside of the box. You have to think about you. It's selfish. In my head, it's selfish.
It's 2:50am and I swear to anything holy, I have no idea what I just wrote about. Today was an off day.
I should be asleep.
