A Mess to be Made
"I help you out the door but once you're gone I just stare out the window"
|
It could've been raining today.
But it just rained in my head, all over the sunny clouds. I was a child again, small on this ground and far from the sky.
I couldn't share. I don't care who you are. I can't share.
I could've slept, but I knew I wouldn't dream anything nice because I don't think that nice. All that's nice is too far off my wishful thinkings. I couldn't even sleep last night. I couldn't even realize I was losing consciousness because in my sleep I was so awake. Awake enough to realize that my room was just my room and just me. It's just me.
The dark still the dark, the time still as early as the morning shouldn't be for me. Sleeping isn't sleeping when you're just not sleeping.
And then some...
I sat in the dark for hours, exchanging a bonding moment with the wintery scene out my window, a radio that's nearly known, and the closest thing beside me to know of my passions. But it's never quite there. And I can never quite share.
I have albums that don't know you. And I know you don't know. But in all this mess, I know you'd make such great friends. It's only a matter of...another lifetime[s].
Don't get me wrong. I can prance as high my chin can go in the low that it drags to my neck that exhibits all alone. And that's when we get to somewhere no way.
Everyday. Someone else is in all this mess.has got to have some fucking initiative. It's not just me, right? I can't be the only one that lives the way I do.
I'll be a fucking welder, I said. Enough money, and I can hide from the job during the job. But I threw bottles today, I know I'd want that...
I thought what I'd really want last night...or, this very early morning. And what's better in this life than to want the things you just...can't..
I fucking can't.
Can you? ...
But it just rained in my head, all over the sunny clouds. I was a child again, small on this ground and far from the sky.
I couldn't share. I don't care who you are. I can't share.
I could've slept, but I knew I wouldn't dream anything nice because I don't think that nice. All that's nice is too far off my wishful thinkings. I couldn't even sleep last night. I couldn't even realize I was losing consciousness because in my sleep I was so awake. Awake enough to realize that my room was just my room and just me. It's just me.
The dark still the dark, the time still as early as the morning shouldn't be for me. Sleeping isn't sleeping when you're just not sleeping.
And then some...
I sat in the dark for hours, exchanging a bonding moment with the wintery scene out my window, a radio that's nearly known, and the closest thing beside me to know of my passions. But it's never quite there. And I can never quite share.
I have albums that don't know you. And I know you don't know. But in all this mess, I know you'd make such great friends. It's only a matter of...another lifetime[s].
Don't get me wrong. I can prance as high my chin can go in the low that it drags to my neck that exhibits all alone. And that's when we get to somewhere no way.
Everyday. Someone else is in all this mess.has got to have some fucking initiative. It's not just me, right? I can't be the only one that lives the way I do.
I'll be a fucking welder, I said. Enough money, and I can hide from the job during the job. But I threw bottles today, I know I'd want that...
I thought what I'd really want last night...or, this very early morning. And what's better in this life than to want the things you just...can't..
I fucking can't.
Can you? ...
_
