Would you really rush out for me now?

Hurt me, hurt me.

An influence for my Oliver Twists

This beautiful, beautiful boy.

Yes, I am anticipating Pretty Little Liars

Lame TV shows are my guilty pleasures!! OK!?

And finally, my newest babies

Meet the beautiful.. Nine West Peroxy. They cost me my entire budget, an arm, a leg, a lung, an ass cheek, both my ears, the left side of my scalp, and my intestines. But they were my favorite Black Friday purchase. I call them..my Oliver Twists.

WE ARE IN LOVE!

BLACK SHOES BLACK SHOES BLACK SHOES BLACK SHOES PEROXIES!

My babies..

BROWN BROWN BROWN BROWN OXFORDS. In love since October.

MERRY ALMOST CHRISTMAS

Love,
Ace.

The cream one, I want it,.

Running on the lowest amount of sleep

My Igabewwa

The smartest 2nd grader in the world. Sometimes she's annoying as fuck, but it's Igabewwa.

Mom with her boyfriend, Dad with his girlfriend

My favorite items from our Thanksgiving shopping spree

CARBONATED DWINKS, NYUMMMMMMMMM hhnng

Zombie me, zombie you

One day, you will find out what happened on this day, this very moment that this picture was captured. For now, just consider my struggling to reach for the stars.

Pizza and Pool

I am the pool shark. Score 2-0. Hyes, I do rule.

His side of the pizzas got mad at him, so they flipped themselves over.

FOUND IT

In this picture: MY HAT!! Disappeared all Spring and all Summer, and now it reunited with me this morning. Vaggy found it..somewhere. So with overwhelming joy, I took the liberty in wearing it to class this morning. Felt badass again. But like always, yeh? Bulleted rants x3

• I'm eating the most orange soup in the world. BEEF NOODLE PARTY!! While drinking orange soda. It's still too early to be admitting that I'm drinking soda. But I really do have a serious soda problem. SERIOUS. Cookies too. Some cookies.
• I met one of my girl crushes this past weekend. I was so nervous, I didn't know what to say. She made me stutter and giggle to myself and blush and look away! OH MY GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.
• Last night, I couldn't stop thinking about Science Camp, Disneyland, and the Philippines. All the things that I miss. All the places I want to go back to. All the places I've collected a few of my happiest memories. The Away From Home feeling. Just because sometimes.. Everybody needs a little time away.
• CRYSTAL CASTLES CRYSTAL CASTLES CRYSTAL CASTLES CRYSTAL CASTLES
• I'm driving to Vegas this break. We're going to stay one entire week there, in a condo. And I would really love to bring someone with me. Of course by default and personal preference at best, I would take Ace. It's a given. But NO, troubled ass foo got WORK. Burlington
• Is that all?
• Yes.
• For now.

Addictions and Obsessions

It's official. Well, it's well beyond official. I'm in love with them. Thanksgiving break has been the first break since Summer ended, which meant that this Thanksgiving break, we were in full swing. Just like Summer, we were nocturnal. We slept during the days, and immediately after waking up, texty texty texty call call call, gather gather gather! We're obsessed with being together. We're addicted to each other. We roam around at night, in the cold, on a couch, everywhere.

WE ARE OBSESSED. WE ARE ADDICTED. I AM IN LOVE.

JDao's dinner

It's Facebook friendly.

LOOK WHO I'M IN BETWEEN. WIFEY AND GIRL CRUSH.


DERPIN' IT UP BABY


HNNNGGG <33


These two..are my mothafuckin' FAVORITE.

(':

Another night and day.

For the past 3 or 4 nights, I have been sleeping at 6 or 7 or 8 in the morning. This morning, James and I stayed awake eating and talking, laying around Mikal's. When I finally woke up, it was 2pm. And we spent the day alphabetizing Mikal's DVD collection. Which is a very large collection.

And now, I took Jamie and myself home so we can finally shower. I have a dinner to attend, then errands to run. Tonight is my last night for this rather eventful Thanksgiving break. And Cheb is here. OK.

It's 6:29pm, and I have lost touch with the rest of the world outside of my kin. My klan. My buddies. THE GROUP.

So much to blog about, so little time.

Until next time.

It's 6am, and I, once again, have not slept

Well, for Black Friday (it's proper to capitalize that, right?), my sister and I left the house at 1, spent half an hour of traffic, then another half hour for a parking space. Grrrrmall was very much crowded. Fortunately, with our luck and my cleverness, we scored a parking space right in front of the entrance door. It was the most satisfying feeling. But actually being in the mall, breathing everyone in, running into everyone, absorbing all their smells and conversations...was unnerving. We did not accomplish anything at Grrrmall. We only ran into a few familiar faces and the highlight of it was Raemon finding an Iphone 4 on the ground. Lucky..

We came back to destroy Fremont and settle at New Park. Ran into every single person we've ever known and their grandmothers. I was losing it once we were at New Park. Every time I ran into someone I knew, they'd say hello to me, and by the time they ask me how I am, my mind is only finally processing who they are and what to respond with. Pac Sun saw me the worst. But it's OK, because one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen worked there. God, she is beautiful. And she interrupted my zoning out just to tell me about the Pac Loot. HNNNNGGG. Oh, and Nobly (who, by the way, may just exist) told me that I reminded her of Dean. She didn't even know we went out, which is what made it so bizarre to me. Roman and Cody were in front of Game Stop. We joined them. Ace left us eventually. Cody decided to marry me. What? Yeah I don't know either. Anddddddd, Vag bought me a hot chocolate.

Black Friday shopping didn't really accomplish anything. Mostly for the lack of cabbage, but I'm sure we'll return again later today when I receive some semblance of sleep..or rest. Or anything that doesn't involve doing a single thing. I would talk about how pleasant my Thanksgiving was, but maybe another entry. For now, I should let myself rest. I only have so much time until I have to wake up again.

On the bright side, I get to look forward my date today! Finally going to watch Love and Other Drugs with Sof, Nicholas, and Rae. Sof asked me out, so of course I am thrilled.

GOODNIGHT..
for now.

22 Hours

I have been awake for 22 straight hours. I'm sure I am exhausted but I cannot seem to fall asleep. Ace is snoring on my bed. Rae is snoring in my phone. And everyone else in the world is snoring. I can already feel it. I am going to sleep through Thanksgiving. This family didn't much believe in Thanksgiving celebrations anyway. Though we've got a turkey. Turk a durk.

• Tonight, after everyone fell asleep, Jordan and I sat on my dining table till 3 in the morning and talked and talked. It all began with religion. The glamorous Last Supper hanging on my wall has always been so controversial. We discussed religion, history, conspiracy theories, and just how fond we were of history. That led us to our current statuses on being recent high school graduates (finding oneself, making decisions, all that dandy stuff). That led us to fears. And discussing fears made me question everything about anything. "What do we really have to fear?" I don't know why, but as he said this, it startled me deeply. I found myself thinking of the things I was scared of, and why exactly. I drew blanks. All blanks. Then we discussed his Psychology instructor bashing Kurt Cobain and the suicide boy who wrote Nirvana lyrics before his death. When ironically, we glorify the story of Romeo and Juliet, the grandfather of all suicide stories. Then I shared with him my personal disinterest in Romeo and Juliet as he explained to me the certain aspect that he liked about it. He said that their story portrayed two characters who displayed how intrinsic love is. At their young age, they attempted to go about their love as if they were adults. And our conversations stretched and dragged on, and then I realized just how amazing Jordan is. His perspectives are different, and he's open-minded, and he sheds new light to me every time we discuss something. He's so very intelligent, and pensive, and what an intellect. He seems to always know what he's talking about, which further eases my conversations with him.
• The best conversations I have with people lately are on my dining table until 3am.
  
• I'm tired now. Officially 23 hours of being awake. I can actually feel the hunger that usually means I need breakfast. But perhaps I should sleep now.
  
• Bugger.
  

More cool samples, The Show Goes On - Lupe Fiasco

Lupe sample Float On by Modest Mouse. Lupe Fiasco? Modest Mouse? Yethh I like it a lot.

Alice Glass. Anyone? Anyone?

Lost in the World - Kanye West?

NYEH, yeah right. I heard Kanye's sample of Bon Iver's Woods though. Lost in the World. It was...nice. But this song itself is amazing. Bon Iver, mmm.

I remember first hearing this song while watching Skins. There was something satisfyingly unsettling about that particular scene.

Hnngg

I enjoyed Skins, I dee gaf.

Internet *Advice

• If you're already upset, don't sign on. Don't do it. You know you're only feeding your own flame.
• You'll see something you don't want to see. Read something you don't want to read. Then you'll feel complied to act upon the intended gesture of what is upsetting you in the first place.
• Unless your composure is ready to handle the shit that you know is out there, then just stay away. Because if you are ready, you'll brush it off. If you aren't, you may or may not bang your head against your keyboard, and watch the blood just drip down.
  
• I've seen the internet drama. I have been the center of it at some point. But I've learned ways to slither through the messes.
  
• Don't sign on. Don't look through. Your curiosity will pester you, but after the next hour, you'll get passed it.
• If you don't want to care, then make it happen. And don't contribute. Don't rebutt. Don't do anything you wouldn't be able to manage later on. Everything you publish is your responsibility. And taking all disagreements into consideration, you and the masses will not see eye to eye. Which means either get passed it, or sulk like everyone else. Might as well bubble with the boils of petty arguments and differences in opinion.
  
• Because you have to understand, not everyone will shut.thefuck.up. So shut the fuck up before they do. You get out quicker. And believe me, as much as you want to retaliate, shutting the fuck up and dropping it is the best way to go.
  
• It takes patience and resistance.
  
• OK. Done.
  

Soul Mates

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."

-Elizabeth Glibert (Eat, Pray, Love)

• I don't know if agreeing to this makes sense to me, but I think agreeing to this makes sense to me. Does that make sense?

Taylor Ann Hoover-Hart

She sincerely makes me wants to be a better person. She already makes me feel like the best person, and I love that about Taylor. She will accept you for exactly who you are and she will unconditionally be there for you. I know for a fact that she's the warmest person I know. Just the thought of her.

Last night, we talked until 3am about everything that's been going on with her, with me, with everyone! Her college plans, Matthew, her social life, my social life, my love life, families, friends, and everything in between. Talking to Tay is like .......................being baptized again. She's a breath of fresh air. It's cleansing and significant and I wish I had Taylor more often. Truthfully and sincerely, she is one of the best people I have ever known. She's right up there with my mom. Which is pretty high. I miss Tay already. I'm going to try to be her breath of fresh air too. It's gonna be awesome guise.

I love..Taylor Ann Hoover-Hart.

Fucking things up

If your complete disregard of everyone's consideration becomes the strain in my relationship with my sister, I could very well drag you out of your own house and do personal damage. I don't give a single fuck how much of an asshole I have to be, you won't be the reason. You will never be worth what my sister and I have worked for.

You don't show up for months, and now your back as part of us? Fuck you and the bull shit you are. I refuse to think my sister is as stupid as she acts when she's around you.

I'm not sure how many times I haave already watched this

Two Door Cinema Club - Eat That Up, It's Good For You from Kevin Lin on Vimeo.

Every day, every night,

Your breathing is the first and last thing I hear.
I wake up to our sighs, and sleep to our snores.
Good night's for the hundredth time, I'll see you on the other side.
Compelling, I say.
You're the most compelling person I have ever met.

And I hate to bite my tongue, but I want you slow,
And I want to resist you.
And I want to keep this in,
like it's the first thing I've ever held on to.

Am I worth it, you ask.
I don't know how, but I knew from the very beginning.
And it's frightening because...
You did too, didn't you?

Alice Glass

I've known this song for such a long time, but I have fallen in love with it again. I love falling in love over again.

Eyes lit. I want short breaths. I found dark eyelids. Nice breast. Like the summer into rough hands.

HAIR HAIR HAIR

I no longer have bangs because they're too long to be considered bangs. I barely have layers to consider layers because my hair is growing and growing and growing. I'm happy I'm lengthy again, but hell it is dull. I look dull! And I'm not really sure what to do with it. Cut it? No, I want my length. Leave it? God, I am bored. Hmmmm, dyeing has never been too exciting for me. Let me think let me think let me think...

SEMO

EY U MAD?

I miss SF

I don't know what it is about today that's making me miss the cold of SF. I want to adventure with my friends, and take endless pictures, and walk to endless places. I want a picnic, a bundle of clothes on, and our sunglasses on.

When the weather clears, we're going. We're going and it'll be perfect like it always is. And I'll drive because I always do, and if we hydroplane, then we hydroplane. And I'll empty my memory chip for this. Don't worry. I got this.

Before

The fear

My baby

What goes on.

Where the wild things are

My backyard was always so nice in the Fall.

Ryler.

The Marines

Hweird.

My boys

We survived high school together. Adventuring, being vegetables at my house, driving to far off places, dissecting scary movies, telling scary tales, and being as brown as our skin could possibly intend it.

The bangs, the bangs.

Harry Potter last night...

DEATHLY HALLOWS...

...was the funniest movie. Ace and I did not understand why we were the only two people in the theater cracking the fuck up. It was because of our commentaries, but what a good movie. I nearly cried you know. I have never been this fond of a Harry Potter film. And Emma Watson. Oh Emma Watson. Wha.. I could not handle it. Sometimes, I don't understand how someone's looks can be so unbearably attractive. Is there a word for this?

Part 2! Excitement!

Should I...

• Cut my hair?
• Or not?
  

Hey,

I'm getting better at managing my financial expenses. Considering that I do have very many to juggle just yet, it has been pretty easy. Food and gas, like I have mentioned before. The money I put in my card finally lasts longer than when a simple whim slaps me across the face. FIGHT TEMPTATION. I am always fighting temptation.

I feel as if that is all I have been doing. November is resist temptation month. And I am doing DAMN good. So damn good that I am perpetually happy with the outcomes of life. Things are smooth sailing. But I can't wait for the next storm. There's always a storm. This is the calm before the storm.

I am so very excited.

Why my life is the best

• My period lasts a day and a half. Max.
  
• Yeah.
  

I FEEL SO SWEDISH

IKEA!

She was right. I did not take pictures of her that day.


Swedish meat bawls.


I made sure I was at my derpiest.


Hey dude.


WHO'S. THAT. POKEMON.





Princess..


Hipsters.




The hipsterest.




Backpacking across Sweden. SVEDEN.

My favorite.