Cheated Hearts
"Kept my high from the second one
Kept my eye on the first one"
Kept my eye on the first one"
So easily it ...
Sometimes I sit down thinking, "I'm not really here right now." And I don't realize I exist after a long time. And then something happens inside me, and I realize I'm in little parts. And I forget it just does that... All the time.
Sometimes I sit down not thinking at all. Or at least I think I don't think. But really, I've only one thing in mind.
Sometimes I sit down so empty that I think my insides left me for the floor. Because at least that way, they rot in front of me and I can see them decomposing. And they tell me that I never really blame any one else but myself.
Sometimes I sit down so pissed that I think I'll never be able to get rid of these shudders. I think that I'll never get myself to get up. And then I think of accidents and incidents. And I think I'm just so sick.
Sometimes I sit down so sad I wish I'd just cry. But as breathless as my heart is left, my eyes are dry and stinging and as empty as I think I could be.
Sometimes I don't sit down at all. Not even on chairs. I just forget about my spine and lay down for what seems like a whole life time when really, a minute has just passed me by and all I'm doing is staring at the clock as it tells me to fuck off already.
Is this good enough for anybody? Because sometimes I think I just need to shut my mouth. Even if it's always shut.
PS I Love You
Why can't I say it back.
Sometimes I sit down thinking, "I'm not really here right now." And I don't realize I exist after a long time. And then something happens inside me, and I realize I'm in little parts. And I forget it just does that... All the time.
Sometimes I sit down not thinking at all. Or at least I think I don't think. But really, I've only one thing in mind.
Sometimes I sit down so empty that I think my insides left me for the floor. Because at least that way, they rot in front of me and I can see them decomposing. And they tell me that I never really blame any one else but myself.
Sometimes I sit down so pissed that I think I'll never be able to get rid of these shudders. I think that I'll never get myself to get up. And then I think of accidents and incidents. And I think I'm just so sick.
Sometimes I sit down so sad I wish I'd just cry. But as breathless as my heart is left, my eyes are dry and stinging and as empty as I think I could be.
Sometimes I don't sit down at all. Not even on chairs. I just forget about my spine and lay down for what seems like a whole life time when really, a minute has just passed me by and all I'm doing is staring at the clock as it tells me to fuck off already.
Is this good enough for anybody? Because sometimes I think I just need to shut my mouth. Even if it's always shut.
PS I Love You
Why can't I say it back.
_
