Gilly

I can actually fucking feel it. Even now. When it gets really late and I start to get sad about everyone. It's like an overcast day when I sort of feel like sobbing but I'm too happy to. It's like rereading things that should have lost its taste. It's like riding a bike and squinting your eyes through the wind but you're only really thinking about this one thing. It's like all the things I'm too embarrassed to say or admit but I wouldn't ever deny. It's like being naked at all times and I enjoy nudity which is probably why I am so in love with this. It's like it can never actually fail me or forget me. It even feels more than I could ever deserve. Everything and everyone is going to suck eventually but I could recognize pretty days this way. I could remember them. I could appreciate them and even when she's sometimes gone for a little while, I can feel alright again because I wear her everyday just to fucking smile about something. And when I'm too grumpy, something stupid will make me smile. Like "I'm the funniest person alive" and shit's true. Sometimes everyone and everything else is death but this fucking thing that I've known for so goddamn long that it feels like it's the only thing I will always know. This fucking thing. This inescapable and inexplicable thing is life.

A grumpy gilligan.