i keep using the word "strive" like i actually ever strive for anything. i don't strive. i don't actually ever strive. if i did, maybe i wouldn't be so often in this loop of a lull. i'm not depressed, i'm quite literally a depressive. you couldn't imagine the sort of brick wall that came flying at my face the moment i realized that. you couldn't imagine much of anybody's life because it's not yours. as far as you are concerned, your own thoughts and observations are fiction. you can't ever actually know somebody's else's life. everything is fiction, and i don't believe a god damn thing.
if aliens were so highly intelligent and biologically advanced, would they really need light to land their goddamn space ship? wouldn't the moon be enough light source for them to land a goddamn space ship on goddamn planet earth? i think so, i really think so. i think that we expect to see lights when they visit us because we would have lights if we were to visit another planet. but they're not humans. humans are idiots. and idiot is a term coined with a certain sentiment, a certain emotion that only a human could coin. it's so pathetic. we are so very pathetic.
