The more time I spend alone, the more I realize how unbearable my OCD is. In fact, I hadn't realized I had OCD until I started spending so much time alone. But OCD is just a fancy acronym for something to be annoyed about. So far, I own piles of journals and notebooks because I have a problem collecting them. You won't believe how many pens I feel the need to constantly carry in my bag just to feel alright. I assign every pen or pencil to a specific journal or sketch book. Things have to be used accordingly or I feel the need to break shit. My room is the epitome of my OCD. All the crap I collect are classified in piles or clusters, but they're all together. Like I've translated that they have separation anxiety from each other. I have two fat piles of beanies that I've set atop two empty alcohol bottles. My shoes are thrown together by my door. My books are huddles together. My scarves are folded neatly together. My sunglasses are lain in a line on top of my book shelf, next to my grouped perfumes and candles. All the quarters I've collected are on top of my amp next to my phones cases. My home pens are neatly standing inside a pail that a friend purchased for me. My pillows are arranged in a way to accommodate my sleeping positions, every night. My mail are filed inside the very bottom drawer of my desk. My charcoal sketch pad is piled with my charcoal utensils. My party shirts are on the top left-hand side of my closet. My sweaters are on the corner beside them. My long sleeves are to the right next to the party shirts. Next to the long sleeves are my tank tops. Next to my tank tops are my favorites. Next to my favorites are two piles of flannels that I've piled according to the frequency of wear. My ipod is organized by artist and album or ep. If an artist doesn't have their shit together on my ipod, I lose it a little. Even the apps on my phone are arranged to my preference. And I refuse to alter them.
ALRIGHT, maybe it isn't so bad. But realizing how anal I am about my shit makes me feel a little insane. I've been losing it lately...
