Peace of Mind

The more I look for my own peace of mind the more I understand how I'll lose my own mind someday. Just as how I'm starting to lose my mind now. It's five in the morning and I'm choking back my own weaknesses. I'm choking back the quietest part of me. I'm choking back this fear instilled in me and I'm choking back the madness of my regrets. Every day is filthy, filled with filthy people and their selfish, filthy minds. And I have my madness to match. I'd rather puke my night dry, just how it will inevitably end, than let my knees falter to everyone else's filth. I'm filthy enough on my own and I'd rather be alone with it. I knew it all along anyway and I will lose my mind before I'll ever allow myself my own peace of mind.

What.fucking.peace? FILTH.